Over the holidays I vacationed in New Orleans with a friend and I went to the gym twice…begrudgingly. He pushes me to go because he knows I’ll be happy that I did but I don’t want to…each time I curse him. The most common excuse I tell myself (in my head of course because most of the things I think would make me sound crazy if I said them out loud) is that I won’t burn enough calories to make it worth it. That I won’t push myself as hard as I should. Wrong! I was sore both times I worked out. Don’t you hate when you prove yourself wrong? GAH! Almost as bad as someone else proving you wrong.
I worked out for less than an hour both times – ran a mile and did some weights (arms one day and legs the next) – and I, little old me, made myself sore. I shall never underestimate myself again.
I bought some jeans before vacation…okay I bought a few things…sue me. I bought a pair of $40 size 8 jeans. $40 may not seem like a lot to you but it is to me. I was so pumped to be in a size 8. So I’ve worn them a few times and broken them in and guess what? They are too big! I’m feeling a mixture of emotions. On one hand – YAY I can wear a size 6. On the other – Why didn’t I just buy the size 6 to begin with and not waste $40? If I stop underestimating myself, I can save money too – BONUS!
A girlfriend once said to me, “Candice, I’ll always look at myself and see the fat girl.” Lord knows I still have those days. Actually, I had one on New Year’s Day. Then today I put on a size 8 suit that I bought a year ago, and it is now too big on me. A year ago someone at my office had to talk me into the 8 because she said the 10 I bought looked too big. So I took off the pants today after my meeting (once I was back in the privacy of my own home of course) and thought of my friend and how just two days ago I felt no fitter than I was two years ago and how wrong I was for even thinking that. I will not underestimate myself or make light of all the hard work I have done. I look great and I’m proud of myself and I’m not ashamed to say both. Rinse. Repeat.
